Walking Each Other Home

Perhaps, as Ram Dass says, we are really just walking each other home.  As I write this I recall when our son was four and he and a friend were playing in the yard.  It was dusk and his friend was to go home which was five houses up the street.  She was afraid to walk in the semi darkness so Tad walked her home, but then he decided he did not want to walk back by himself.  So he and his friend made two or three trips between the houses until he came in and ask me to walk with them.  Sometimes we all need a little help walking home.

Giving our support to each other as we walk our paths can help us keep on keepin on. There have been many times that I would have given up but someone encouraged and supported me on in my journey.  There are times when the journey seems too long and the night too dark to continue on.  

At age four my son realized that five houses away at dusk seemed like an impossibly long journey to take alone so he ask me to walk with him.  There are times in life when we need others support but can not ask for it.  It may be easier to admit to fear at age four than at age forty; ego often stops the adult from asking for help and he/she may struggle on alone rather than lose face.   

Recently a homeless alcoholic would not go into recovery until another person stopped and ask if she could walk the distance with him to the rehab center. She did and he made it to a place where he has the opportunity of addressing his addiction.  I am guessing that he was afraid to go into rehab despite the dangers of being homeless, alone, and on the street.  The risk of being vulnerable to asking for help sometimes seems greater that the risks of not asking.  

The journey may seem lonely until another offers a hand to help us along.  This is how we walk each other home.  Taking the time to pause, look, listen, and hear others will impact our journeys as well as theirs.  A helping hand works both ways.

Walking each other home we can really get to know the other.  We begin to to find the commonality in our lives.  If we exchange our life stories rather than our opinions we learn that we each in our own way are dealing with two basic emotions, love and fear.  Fear contracts while love expands us.

Fear for me manifests in ways that creates separation between me and others; love erases the barriers of fear.  Fear often hides behind anger, prejudice, hate, and other negative feelings.  These negative feelings appear powerful on the surface but are masks for a greater feeling of being afraid of the unknown and the misunderstood.  As I really get to know the other, especially if this means confronting my fears and prejudices, I find there are commonalities with the other, and knowing this helps me collapse the barriers my fear creates. 

I believe that fear is a part of our being encultureated to not trust our differences and diversity.  Yet it is this diversity that creates the beauty that I find in life.  To me the world would be void of color if not for the differences between all things.  Sameness and safety are boring and do not challenge me to grow and mature, check and rethink my opinions, learn from my encounters, and understand my uncertainties as I walk along 

The danger of this exists to those who are not sure of themselves, their beliefs, and what they say are their truths.  When we doubt ourselves and the encultureated teachings of society it is hard to trust what we have been told. This can lead to clinging to these thoughts and beliefs that do not tolerate  questioning.  This, I believe, interferes with acceptance of and trust in each other. 

Questioning promotes tolerance.  Tolerance teaches me to accept differences rather that settling for sameness.  Diversity adds color to my life and creates a rich panorama of sound, color, and feeling alive.