I read a post by a blogger entitled "The Walk", about the author's experience with a homeless man. It reminded me of my working with the inner images and fears that I often feel when I encounter the disenfranchised in my life. At times I avoid really looking into these people's faces. Perhaps because I fear that they represent a shadow of me?
I believe we each carry a fear of our own loss and disenfranchisement. It often lurks just below our conscious awareness. In "The Walk" this author took the time and had the courage to confront her own fears. In doing so she found the similarities in their lives. He was not alien to her life and her experiences. He is after all, as are all people, human.
Confronting human pain often brings up my up own fears of unresolved feelings in my life. I realize that all of this exists within me. The more I attempt to avoid that realization the more I withdrawn from others pain in an attempt to shield myself from this. I don't want to take a walk with whomever and whatever triggers this fear inside me. I am afraid to address this shadow side in me.
It takes courage to sit down with what frightens me and invite that fear into a conversation. Looking directly into the face of another and accurately seeing what is reflected there becomes a mirror to my true self. Can I hold the gaze or will I deflect it and look away?
That is the question, isn't it? It takes great courage to sit with my own shadows, fears, prejudices, and judgements. It is not what I fear from others that drives my resistance, it is what I fear within me that keeps me avoiding their gaze. Whatever I confront on the outside is a reflection of what is alive in my shadow self. Looking into the face of the homeless, the disenfranchised, the angry, the hurt reminds me that I too hold this within me. Understanding and accepting this allows me to release my fears which keep me locked away from my own humanity and unable to stand at the center of my humanness.
Fear always shuts me down while love and acceptance opens me up. That realization moves me beyond being afraid and into seeing and accepting the humanity in all. The author of "The Walk" did not turn away from her fears, stayed her course and touched this man's life, no matter the circumstances he now finds himself in. I believe she held the gaze of whatever this man reflected in her and in doing so not only faced her own fears but also re-reminded him of his humanity.
It seems so much easier to hide from this gaze in life, but by avoiding this truth my fear increases and surrounds me. Looking into the gaze of pain and suffering the totality of humanity becomes real. Suffering is not faceless....
When I realize and accept this I am not only able to look into the outer faces that reflect fear but into the inner ones as well. When I do this I realize that they are mirrors of each other and my sitting and having a conversation with my fears release their hold on me. It is another step toward personal freedom.
Hari Om, to all of my friends......
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