Being The Witness

Being our own witness is like waking up in the morning looking into the mirror and noticing ourselves; not judging or criticizing, just neutrally observing the quality of being awake.  The witness/observer is without judgement, praise, or criticism.  The image we see is in the eye of the beholder, our self, and to be nonjudgmental allows us to examine change without fear.

This frees us from attachment to ourselves, our thoughts, our opinions, and others opinions of us.  Stepping back from thoughts and opinions, ours and others, allows us to become free of ourselves and to then become self aware. When we learn that within  each of us exists a place without attachment the objects that have defined self evaporate.  The witness is our centering place that will guide our inner work.

We find our joy and compassionate presence exist here and we realize that almost every outer thing that draws our attention is a reflection of our own attachments.  As we recognize these attachments of self we can begin to let go of them.  We can only let go of what we know as our own and that belongs to us; until we own something we cannot release it.  

My work and profession were important to me and were a crucial part of my self identity.  As I approached retirement age I began to think about how I would see myself after I retired.  Then late one April night I had a stroke and who I am, and how I see and identify me, suddenly changed.

During the process of having the stroke and my weeks in the hospital and rehab that self image began to change.  It would no longer be my self definition.  I had worked for years thinking, visualizing, and defining me beyond my profession.  On that night in April life quickly forced me toward a change that I was not yet prepared for..

I witnessed changes taking place the moment I awoke at home and throughout my night in the emergency room.  I found the place within me that held no attachments and the impartial witness came forward and took charge.  It manifested in my outer life as I began to navigate the circumstances I found myself in.

I woke up to my reflection in the mirror of self and through neutral observation began evaluating my situation and choosing my responses.  Fear quickly left as I did not attach to that, and being free from fear I began to impartially look at my options.  Here I was being forced into a decision I had wrestled with for a  number of years; how to gracefully move into retirement.  Life had made the decision, so the fact of retirement was going to happen, and I was left to decide how with grace I would allow it to manifest.

It is our acceptance of life's occurrences that allow us to accept the circumstances we experience.  If we work through grace our fears disappear and options become clear.  There is a "knowing" of being the witness to our lives that allows us certainty in our decisions.  We no longer need to second guess ourselves because as the witness to our lives we can decide with the assurance that we trust ourselves to decide and in that awareness we are free.